Ran 6.8 miles on trails north of the high school at CC practice. Nellie and Ken looked better today. Ben is living at my house for now, trouble with his family, don't know for how long. I whirlpooled my knee again. Left foot also a little sore.
30 years later:
This log entry brings back a flood of memories about my own family. One quality that was always present in our house was the openness and willingness to help others. My father was a high school art teacher, and I think the list of teenagers who showed up for dinner or hung around on weekends or even credited my father with keeping them sane through the stress of high school would be amazingly long. Another mouth or two at dinner wasn't rare, and my mother's worry that she couldn't cook was never an issue ... we were all hungry!
While certainly easy to tease for his absent-mindedness and unorthodox ideas, Ben was still a friend of mine. He had a talent for running, and when he had his stuff together he could run quite well. But he and his father had trouble getting along, and at this point in his life he had basically been kicked out of his own house. Ben ended up staying with my family for many months, sharing my small bedroom with me. Oh, we'd go at it occasionally, like any pair of teenage roommates would, but I can say with pride that my parents never really balked at helping Ben, and I know he was grateful. I don't know if we would have had him as a contributing member of our team if my parents had not opened their door (and refrigerator!) to welcome him as just another part of the family. Perhaps he'd have just quit school and wandered off. I have no idea where he is today, and no one I know has any idea either. If you do, I'd love to hear from you.
I suppose we all have issues with our parents. I dread the day when my own sons might rattle off their complaints about me, either to their friends or (someday) spouses and in-laws. We do our best as parents, most of the time it works out. I know that my parents did their best, and they certainly instilled a core set of values in me not just by words, but also by deeds. These would include:
- Look for the good in all people, encourage it to come forward
- Help a friend in need, expect nothing in return
- Be curious and ask questions, don't believe everything you hear
- Share a laugh together, nothing bonds people together like laughter
- Hard work pays dividends, even though it might not be immediately obvious
- Learning is one of the most important things you can strive for, always seek to educate yourself
- Enjoy the outdoors, swim in the cold water, explore the dark woods
- Believe in yourself, even when others don't
I'm sure I'm missing something with this list, and I'm sure I've oversimplified something as well. But let's not quibble over details. My friend and cross country teammate was in trouble, my family happily reached out to him and showed him love and acceptance. Isn't that what it's all about, really, in the end?
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